Buying your first toy can be an exciting, but also frustrating experience. I know this first hand because I was in the same position not too long ago. I’ll admit, I wasn’t even sure what I was looking for. I ended up buying a few “first toys” before I settled on one I could proudly call “my first”. Here’s what I learned (so you won’t have to waste as much time and money as I did):
1. Check the “Body Safe” Label
Be sure to follow the rule of thumb that body-safe materials include non-porous silicone, glass, and wood. While there are plenty of real body-safe toys on the market, there are just as many phonies out there. Do a bit of extra research to make sure it really is body safe. Toy manufacturers have caught on to the growing popularity of body-safe materials in toys, which is why they’ve begun to brand that their materials as “safe” when they’re really not.
2. Take Your Time
This is all about YOU! Don’t feel rushed to settle on the first toy you see. Sure, there are some well-known ones (a la Sex in the City’s rabbit-style vibrator) but that doesn’t mean it’s right for everyone. Think about what excites you the most and where you feel that in your body. Don’t be afraid to explore those feelings and urges. Trust me, with all the options out there, there is something out there that will make your lady parts sing.
3. It Doesn’t Have to Look Like a Dick
I’m not saying you should stay away from dicks or things that resemble them. Please, by all means—if you like them, go for it. But feel free to explore the design-centric sex toys that don’t resemble that fleshy appendage. These toys are designed with a woman’s anatomy in mind and can often be more comfortable.
4. Get a Good Lube
Lube is great whether you’re a novice or a sex toy expert. It decreases the friction on your lady parts, making it a much smoother and enjoyable experience. I highly recommend water-based lube as it won’t interfere with the material in sex toys. The “rule-of-thumb” used to be that silicone lube breaks down silicone toys. However, in my experience, I’ve found that silicone lube is fine as long as your toy is 100% silicone and not mixed with other materials (which is pretty common among cheaper sex toys). As always, be sure to do a spot test beforehand!
5. Consult Sex Toy Bloggers
I CANNOT stress this enough! There are plenty of well-informed folks out there who review sex toys so that you can make informed decisions about your next purchase. When I was looking for an insertable toy, I became overwhelmed by how many options were out there. After searching countless blogs, I found that I resonated the most with Miss Ruby Reviews. Miss Ruby is an experienced sex toy reviewer whose reviews are in-depth and honest—perfect for first timers! She is also sex-positive, non-judgmental, and keen to issues surrounding human sexuality. I encourage you to check her out! All bloggers have their own style and flair, so scope out the ones you vibe with (yep, pun intended).
The point here is to keep exploring yourself and most of all, have fun! Your first vibrator should not only be something that knocks your socks off, but also something you’re proud to own.