In the days since the worldwide Black Lives Matter protests began in the spring, we have been finding ways to heal and be better, slowly but surely. We’ve transformed our anger into action. We joined book clubs to learn more about racial justice. We’ve initiated difficult conversations about race in our own communities. We voted a problematic president out of the White House.
But one area of racial justice that’s often overlooked is right in the center of our homes: the bedroom.
You might have heard terms like “daddy issues,” “thirsty,” or “dramatic” to describe the behavior of women and femmes who face difficulties with unhealthy relationships and sexual patterns. Attachment theory—the study of how childhood attachment patterns affect how we act in adult relationships—can help explain some of these patterns, no slut-shaming undertone required.
Maybe you’re a serial monogamist trying to see what the wild world of casual dating has to offer. Maybe you find yourself constantly chasing emotionally unavailable people. Maybe you can’t figure out why you can’t stop texting bae 85 times in a row when you’re upset.
When you’re ready to break out of a pattern that no longer serves you, attachment theory can help you make sense of intense emotions and impulses.
Racing heart, shallow breathing, tensed muscles, and goosebumps. Sounds pretty sexy, right? Not always.
If we look closely, the physical symptoms of anxiety can overlap with some things we experience during sex and arousal. Though they share these physical experiences, anxiety and sex are not happy bedfellows. “Anxiety is a major contributor to diminishing frequency of sex and diminishing capacity for enjoyment of sex,” says Colorado-based certified sex therapist Indigo Stray Conger.
Let’s explore some of the more common ways anxiety can impact your sex life (and some tips to find let go and enjoy sex again!).
Sometimes the intensity and spontaneity of aquickiesatisfies your sex craving. And especially when you and your partner both have over-packed calendars, something's better than nothing. But other times, a slow buildup with plenty of foreplay leads to increased intimacy, lower inhibitions, and more enjoyable sex. Most of us even want more of it: While foreplay tends to last only 12 minutes,both sexes would like it to last about 18 minutes.
In that spirit, here's everything you need to know about foreplay, plus ideas for how to liven it up if you want more than the typical makeout session.
Not interested in sex these days? Studies show that nearly 40% of women will experience some type of sexual problem over the course of their lives, and 70% with low sexual desire report negative results such as poor self esteem. If you’ve experienced a loss of libido, were you able to determine why?
Lesbians have greatsex, and we have the data to prove it. Research published in the journal Archives of Sexual Nature found that while straight people have sex more often, lesbians report having far more orgasms — 86 percent of the time — compared to their heterosexual counterparts, who orgasm only 65 percent of the time.
But how do we have this earth-shattering, orgasm-giving sex? It’s not just about oral sex— though there’s plenty of that, too. To avoid the dreaded “lesbian bed death” thought to come with long-term relationships, lesbians have to get more creative with our sex positions to keep things exciting.
Whether you’ve been together for 2 months or 20 years, here are some of the best lesbian sex positions you can incorporate into your sex life to keep the passion flowing.
It sounds like a philosophical question — "What's the difference between a real and a fake orgasm?"
While orgasms might be more obvious if you have a penis (though even then, people can get creative if they want or need to fake it), there is a lot of confusion over what constitutes a “real”, so-called "female orgasm” and why someone would fake one.
We go more in-depth on what a real orgasm is and feels like in another article (which you can read here). But for this guide, we’ll talk about what a fake orgasm can be, why people do it, if it’s wrong, and what to do if your partner (or you) are faking it and want to change that.
Looking for a couples vibrator can feel overwhelming. There are so many different ones out there — which one do you choose? Below, we've selected some of the best sex toys for couples out there for different experiences and different tastes. We also have a couple of surprises at the end that you can try right now for free, so if you're curious... read on!
Before we learn how to talk, we are already experiencing the world through our senses. As we grow up and have more things that occupy our minds, the sensations that shape our experiences become afterthoughts.
Becoming aware of the different feelings and sensations can help keep you in the present and heighten intimacy. And yes, this awareness can also help you have better sex and pleasure (and orgasms, too).
That’s wheresensation playcomes in — it’s the act of engaging your senses in different ways to heighten your pleasure. Thesesensescome in all shapes and forms, from visual to auditory to tactile. Learn more about how to incorporate sensation play into your routine.
Although the Lioness Vibrator is primarily thought of as a product for self-discovery, it’s also a great tool for our-discovery. Basically, what I’m saying is that it can also be one of the best sex toys out there for couples. Not only is it a great vibrator, it can also help you and your partner have better sex (with and without the vibe).