Last summer, after my last relationship ended, a friend encouraged me to revel in my newfound freedom by going to sex parties. Yup, those are what they sound like — parties for sex.
But for me, they were much more than that. They were places for me to meet sex-positive people, overcome shame, and get to know my sexuality.
Over the course of the past year or so, I’ve attended upwards of a dozen sex parties, which put me onan emotional journey that ultimately increased my confidence, openness, and willingness to take risks.
Here are a few lessons I’ve learned along the way that have helped me progress in my sex life and my life overall.
The first rule of Masturbation Club is how you masturbate is up to you. Your body, your choice.
And it’s true that masturbation looks very different for all of us; some of us may be pillow-humpers, some of us may enjoy penetrative sex toys, and some of us may just enjoy some spit and our own hands.
The second rule, though, is masturbation can be fun when it’s mutual!
Before you ask, yes, mutual masturbation is different than having sex with a partner—even though it is just as fun!
Racing heart, shallow breathing, tensed muscles, and goosebumps. Sounds pretty sexy, right? Not always.
If we look closely, the physical symptoms of anxiety can overlap with some things we experience during sex and arousal. Though they share these physical experiences, anxiety and sex are not happy bedfellows. “Anxiety is a major contributor to diminishing frequency of sex and diminishing capacity for enjoyment of sex,” says Colorado-based certified sex therapist Indigo Stray Conger.
Let’s explore some of the more common ways anxiety can impact your sex life (and some tips to find let go and enjoy sex again!).
Outside of the military community, Memorial Day is generally pretty sexy. Bikinis, beer and barbecues; steaks, sunscreen, and swimming pools. It’s a day many civilians look forward to.
Inside the military community, however, things can look and feel a bit different. For a military spouse, it’s often a day where we anticipate our service member needing more love than they give. It’s a day when we know they’re going to be thinking of all the people they’ve loved and lost - people they’ve endured everything with, from boot camp to wars.
This begs the question; how do you maintain intimacy with something like death and loss hanging heavy in the air? The answer is so simple, it may surprise you!
In the world of sex, fetishes and fantasies are often viewed as taboo. While you can lean toward science andstudiesto tell you that they’re not actually that uncommon, chances are you’ve got the best possible person to share your sexual fantasies with; your partner.
Still, figuring out how to share your sexual fantasies with someone may seem difficult at first. If you’ve never approached the subject, you may be unsure of what to ask, how to ask it, and how to react.
Fortunately, we’ve compiled a simple list of tips and tricks for how to talk to your partner about your sexual fantasies and theirs.
As a sex writer who spends a good portion of my time writing guides and advice pieces for better sex, I’m often conflicted because there’s never just one good way to do anything.
There are ways. Plural.
Blow jobs are no different; they can be quick and dirty, a surprise, warm-up, or foreplay. But, if you want to take it up a notch and give the crème de la crème of blow jobs—no pun intended—I recommend the following tips:
If I could give you a step-by-step recipe to theperfectblowjob, I would, but unfortunately, there’s no such thing. Since preferences and sensitivities vary from person to person, and sometimes even from one day to the next, there’s no ‘go-to-procedure’ for all.
Fortunately, if you’re wondering how to give a good blow job, there are a few dos and don’t that separate the bad from the good, and the good from the outstanding.
What goes up must come down! Isaac Newton said it first, and it is true for much more than physical objects controlled by gravity.
When we reach any kind of elated and euphoric state, we're bound for an inevitable come-down, and—if we don't take care—potentially a huge crash. Most of us have at some point experienced feeling down or even depressed after a blissful or mind-blowing event, whether a party, a holiday, an exerting physical performance or something else that brings us high.
For as long as there's been sex, people have searched to find ways to make it better—more pleasurable, longer, withbetter orgasms, you name it. Enter aphrodisiacs. Derived from “Aphrodite” (the name of the Greek goddess of love),this term refers to substances that stimulate sexual desire. And while there isn't much scientific proof behind most aphrodisiacs, you still find couples ordering oysters on Valentine's Day in the hopes they'll get lucky. So let's take a look at the history of aphrodisiacs and if you should consider trying any.
Not interested in sex these days? Studies show that nearly 40% of women will experience some type of sexual problem over the course of their lives, and 70% with low sexual desire report negative results such as poor self esteem. If you’ve experienced a loss of libido, were you able to determine why?
Sex, and what is sexy, lies on a massive spectrum that is highly personalized to each individual person. So you can bet that when it comes to choosing the right sex club, you're going to want to find a group that aligns with what you think is sexy. So if you’re wondering where to begin when delving into the wide world of sex clubs, here are a few places to start.
Sex clubs may seem taboo or risque, but as Grace learned, sex clubs are about finding what is erotic for you, as the individual, and creating a safe space to explore it. Still, it’s natural to feel nervous about attending. If you want to push the boundaries of your comfort zone, but are not sure what to expect, here are three important things to know before visiting your first sex club or sex party.