Throughout the course of human history, we’ve really stumbled upon some great practices with incredible benefits. One of those practices ismindfulness — the art of being present, fully aware of the moment we’re in, and observing or taking part without judgement.
For many people, mindfulness is a part of their spiritual or meditative practices, and for others it is a tool in their toolbox combattinganxiety.
For the next few minutes, however, it’s going to be a part of our solo play exploration. Here’s everything you need to know about mindfulmasturbation:
What is mindful masturbation?
Mindfulmasturbation is a practice that involves being fully present and aware of the sexual experience we’re having with ourselves. It involves making intentional choices, remaining aware of the way our body is or isn’t responding to self-pleasure, and truly witnessing the depths/heights of pleasure as they occur.
Generally speaking, mindful masturbation is not guided, though using a guided audio track can help learn the skill.
Are there any benefits to mindful masturbation?
Yes! Mindful masturbation comes with a whole host of benefits:
- A Fulfilling Sense of Self Care: Slowing down and tending to our bodies is one of the most tried-and-true forms ofself care. By incorporating mindfulness into your masturbation sessions, you’re allowing yourself to take care of your sexual needs and your physical pleasure — and relievingstress at the same time!
- An Enhanced Understanding of What Pleases You: We receive a lot of messaging day in and day out about what should and shouldn’t turn us on. Many times, this information is heteronormative, male-centered, and (let’s be honest) just not it. Mindful masturbation opens up the opportunity for you to explore what reactions your mind and body have to various types of stimulation — both mental and physical.
- Better Orgasms: When we’re in the moment of pleasure and focused on what’s happening inside our mind and body, our experience of it improves. Mindful masturbation leads to mindfulorgasms — and what better way is there to experience peak pleasure than fully and as it’s happening?
How to try mindful masturbation
Whether you’re looking for increased self-awareness,better orgasms, or an enhanced soloplay experience, here’s how to try mindful masturbation:
Step 1: Set the mood
Setting the mood for masturbation is a great way to get yourself in the right head space for mindful masturbation. Create an atmosphere that feels sensual, self-love focused, and conducive to paying attention to your own body.
Step 2: Lie down and be in the present moment
Before you start touching yourself sexually, it’s important to make sure you’re fully present. Lying down and taking a fewdeep breaths while you bring your awareness to your body as it is can help make mindful masturbation more accessible.
Step 3: Start exploring your body
Begin by touching yourself in ways that feel good, especially if they turn you on. Linger onsensations that bring you pleasure without speeding things up or progressing to more. Simply note what feels good and keep doing that until it doesn’t or you want to move on to more/other sensations.
Step 4: Focus on elongating the experience, not having an orgasm
Don’tedge yourself orstop your orgasms, but don’t focus on having one either. Mindful masturbation requires us to surrender to the experience of soloplay as it happens, not as we want it to happen. Enjoy your pleasure and don’t worry about when, if, or how an ending will occur.
Step 5: If orgasm happens, let yourself stay present
If you happen to orgasm while mindfully masturbating, really let yourself be aware of the experience. Observe how it feels in your body, where your mind goes, etc, and do the same once theorgasm is done. Stay in your body and usher yourself out of the your solo session slowly and intentionally.
Mindful masturbation makes you a better Sexplorer
Learning how to masturbate mindfully can no doubt bring the benefits we already discussed (as well as a few others!). It’s a great way to delve into your soloplay and get every single moment of pleasure out of it.
Mindful masturbation can also make it easier toexperiment and explore if and when the mood to try something new strikes. Being present while we give something new a try allows us to note what’s working, what’s not, and compare it to our typical experiences.
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