Whether you’re strapped for cash or just looking for a discreet way to get off around the house, homemade sex toys are totally worth exploring. But sex means different things to different people, so we’ve put together an initial list that lets sexual variety take up the space it deserves.
Warning: Your house may start feeling a little kinky the more you read. 😉
Ground Rules for Homemade Sex Toys
Before you go on a sexy scavenger hunt to find sex toys laying around the house, you need to remember two rules:
1 - Don’t Penetrate Without a Barrier
While at home sex toys are cost-effective and accessible, they are not always body-safe. Some materials are more porous, and most of these objects are naturally more likely to come into contact with bacteria that don’t belong in your anus or vagina.
Err on the side of caution and cover your DIY sex toys with an external condom.
2 - Safety First, Sex Second
You’re not going to have a good time if you don’t consider the safety of the object you’re hoping to use by yourself or with a partner.
Here are just a few examples where something can go from super hot to super not in the blink of an eye:
- Using a glass bottle as a phallus but it breaks because it’s not tempered glass like a glass dildo.
- Pouring melted wax from a scented candle onto a partner without realizing it is much different than a low-temperature candle meant for wax play.
- Inserting a small object without a flared base into the anus only to lose it and have to have it medically removed.
4 Dildos Laying Around Your House
If you’re into penetrative sex, these are the homemade sex toy for you...just don’t forget the lube!
1 - Getting Frisky with Fresh Produce
Any number of phallic foods can offer some delicious dildo action:
- Carrots offer a tapered experience, just make sure it’s not going to snap if you play too hard!
- Corn offers a textured element to penetrative play.
- Zucchini vary in length and size, making it easy to find just what you like.
- Bananas have a natural curve that may help find your g-spot or p-spot with ease.
Keep the ground rules in mind when playing with your food though; if your homemade dildo is too skinny it can snap and easily become a problem. We also recommend washing thoroughly before and after use, even though you’ll be using an external condom with it.
2 - Don’t Sing Into Your Hairbrush, Masturbate With It!
One of the beautiful things about hair brushes is if you flip them over and use the handle as a dildo, you’ve got a flared base. This makes them safer for anal penetration because they won’t be sucked up into your butthole.
Hairbrush handles also often have different girth and textures to them making them more affordable options that allow you to explore your pleasure.
3 - Mini But Mighty Homemade Dildos
If you’re looking for something smaller than a hairbrush or vegetable, look no further than what’s in the palm of your hand!
Tiny tools that can be used as penetrative sex toys include:
- Markers (Cap side down!)
- Makeup, like mascara tubes and eyeliner pens
- Your fingers! (Okay, so a little on the nose here and not exactly homemade but they still count if you ask us.)
4 - Bigger DIY Dildos You Probably Already Have
Opposite to our tiny turn-ons above, you likely have plenty of larger options laying around. If you’re into being stretched or challenging yourself, consider larger homemade sex toys like:
- Plastic Bottles
- Baseball Bats
- Bigger, Girthier Vegetables (Eggplant, anyone?🍆)
3 DIY Vibrator Alternatives
Perhaps penetration isn’t your thing and you really vibe with vibes. Worry not, you have options!
Whether you’re waiting for your favorite vibrator to charge, or just not in a position to buy one yet, you’ve got plenty of options for DIY vibrators:
1 - Make Yourself Smile with an Electric Toothbrush
Okay, so this one could technically be used internally as well but electric toothbrushes make one hell of a clitoral stimulator. Just flip it over, turn it on, and hold it up against whatever erogenous zone suits your fancy. (If you have a clit, this is a great place to explore.)
If you really want to get the most out of your electric toothbrush, consider buying an extra head or brush just for sexual arousal. Adding lube to extra soft bristles can offer a different vibration than the base of the toothbrush altogether.
2 - That’s No Showerhead, That’s a Vibrator
No matter where you prefer your vibration, a showerhead is a great way to stimulate yourself or a partner! Experiment with water pressure settings and wash your stress away with a good ole fashioned water-induced orgasm.
3 - Is That a Phone in Your Pocket?
Why have a smartphone when you can have a sex toy phone?
Okay, so you can have both but you may want to use your Do Not Disturb feature if you’re going to be using your phone as a vibrator - unless of course, you’ve got a partner who wants to call and initiate those vibrations.
3 Homemade BDSM Sex Toys
Why spend tons of money on pricey sex toys and accessories when you can try things on for size with these DIY BDSM sex toys:
1 - Restraints Hidden in Plain Sight
Make no mistake about it: neckties make great restraints. They’re long, they’re soft, and they may be laying around in your closet begging to be used.
If neckties are not available to you, some other options for homemade restraints are:
- Yoga Straps
2 - Kink in the Kitchen - Impact Play Edition
If you’re into impact play, your kitchen is ripe with sex toys. Experiment with spanking by using silicone spatulas or wooden spoons.
You can also use smaller wooden cutting boards with handles as paddles. (We dare you to see them as anything else from now on!)
3 - Got Clothespins? How About Paperclips?
If you’re into nipple play, look no further than paper clips and clothespins. These are great, cheap alternatives to nipple clamps that you can keep laying around the house...without ever being questioned.
3 DIY Sex Furniture & More
So we may not be able to tell you about a Sybian hiding in your house, but we sure can help make your furniture and other household elements a part of your sex and masturbation:
1 - Ride the Armrest
Whether you’ve got a dildo to ride or not, your couch’s armrest is a great place to straddle and grind to your heart’s content. You can even experiment with sensations by including pillows or towels on top of the armrest.
2 - Don’t Throw the Throw Pillows Away
Don’t knock a couch or bed covered in throw pillows; people pay good money for sex wedges when throw pillows make a perfectly usable substitute.
Whether you’re masturbating or engaging in partnered play, use throw pillows to experiment with angles. Getting head? Consider placing a pillow under your lower back. Penetrating a partner while they’re on all fours? Lay them on top of a pillow or two and see how that feels for you both.
Pillows also work muck the same as a couches armrest can; that is, they’re excellent for grinding and dry-humping for stimulation.
3 - Yoga and Sensory Swings for Sex
If you’ve got either one of these swings available to you, consider yourself lucky. Both make excellent alternatives to sex swings and offer a few different ways to get down and dirty, whether it’s partnered sex, inverted masturbation, or even making certain positions more accessible for all bodies.
Pro-tip: If you’re turned on by suspension or binding, yoga silks are a great way to experiment with how you feel about taking part in it. They are great for simulating binding and suspension without needing knots or hooks, and allow more control than being bound with rope may allow.
Do It Yourself With What You’ve Got
While this list certainly isn’t exhaustive, we hope it’s gotten the juices flowing. Whether those juices are in your brain or elsewhere is your business!
As long as you’re keeping safety and health at the forefront, your house is ripe with all sorts of homemade sex toys waiting to be explored. The only question now is, which one will you start with and when?
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